One of the great things about chess is the singularity of attention that it requires. But during the game, thoughts about our performance can still creep in–especially when we blunder or feel that we are in danger of losing–and these can hurt our game. The thoughts we have before and after the game can affect us as well. Here is a sampling of mine, along with the arguments I use to try to counteract them.
I’m never going to get good at chess.
When is never and what is good? The more I think about this one, the more I think it is simply an expression of impatience at how long it takes to improve at chess, which is likely the result of an unrealistic idea of how much improvement is possible in a given time frame. Chess improvement comes slowly and at a different pace for each person. Period.
My opponent is higher rated and thus has every chance of winning.
Have you ever seen a sports team that looks great on paper and performs miserably? (Hello 2023 NY Mets, whose highest-in-baseball payroll didn’t even get them a winning record.) Why? Because baseball isn’t played on paper, and neither is chess. You know how your own performance and rating fluctuate in either direction? So do those of your opponent. The one number that appears on a given day cannot possibly be a complete representation of a person’s chess performance. There are a zillion scenarios in which you could defeat someone with a higher rating, the most obvious one being that they are having a bad day and you are having a good one.
My opponent is lower rated, so I must not lose. If I lose, I’ll be a laughingstock to myself and anyone who knows my chess app usernames. Besides, I’m a better player than my rating indicates, so I will have lost by a bigger rating gap than it looks, which will hurt even more.
Do you know any chess players who have never lost to someone with a lower rating? It just isn’t possible. Do you have the leisure time to look up the chess usernames of your fellow players and look down your nose at them when you see that they have lost to an opponent who was lower rated? Do you really think that your chess performance is completely, unerringly represented by that one number? Of course not. Besides, when you lose to someone with a lower rating, you will have brought a little chess happiness into their life.
All of my opponents have some secret chess knowledge that I’m not privy to (or I’m not smart enough to absorb) so even if I play without blunders, they’ll get me in the end.
This can be a tough feeling to combat. When, like me, you are in a lower rating range, you encounter a lot of trap setters and people who don’t follow the opening principles that your teacher insists on (controlling the center, developing your pieces, and getting your king to safety). Such people–I call them tricksets–still beat you sometimes. But they aren’t using secret chess knowledge, just gimmicky traps that will keep them in that lower range, while your fundamentals will stand you in good stead as you climb.
Oh, no, I blundered my queen! I’m a goner.
Yes, it is daunting when you didn’t see that bishop way across the board, and now your opponent has plus 9. Or more. But if you’ve played for any length of time at all you’ve seen an opponent blunder their own queen several moves after you lost yours. It happens. When it doesn’t, just take this as a reminder to be vigilant, always. As they say, it’s win, lose, or learn, and this is a reminder that even when you think you are blunder-checking without consciously thinking about it, you can still miss something.
Why did I ever think chess was enjoyable? I hate the way I feel when I lose. I have to blink back the tears whenever I blunder a high-value piece or see that checkmate coming.
Why? Because you have enjoyed playing many times, and you always enjoy studying it and talking about it. It’s like anything in life–when you are in the midst of experiencing some pain, you want to quit. Why do you think there is the saying “‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”? I know, losing at chess hurts. And the high you get from winning at chess is much more fleeting than the pain of losing. But maybe one reason chess is here is to teach us not to take these things so hard and to realize what is really important in life. Those are invaluable lessons at any age.
Note: The illustration above is a magnetic frame available from Zazzle.
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